I don’t see color.”

Really? That’s sad. Really sad. So, you don’t notice a bright crimson cardinal flitting through avocado-green leaves on a spring day? You can’t tell the difference between MAC Ruby Woo and Russian Red? Was your wedding dress purple when you thought it was champagne? Or if you are very light complected and after hours and hours of cooking yourself in the blazing sun, you have no idea that your efforts have only made you an angry shade of dusty rose as opposed to the sun-kissed bronze you’ve been working for (Also, don’t do it. Embrace your color—or lack of—before you get skin cancer and wrinkles)?

So, when you see a person of color do you fail to see the beautiful skin tones in every shade from onyx to café au lait? Because if that’s really the case, you live a very sad, bland, and boring existence. Or you have a medical condition that must be addressed (please address it). Because in pretending to see the world in muted shades of gray you fail to see something that is so blatantly diverse, it is literally popping with striking varieties of color everywhere you look.

I get what is trying to be said with those words. But here’s why that statement is not only false, it’s really not helpful.

Saying you don’t see color denies the color of a person and actually upholds racism because that notion erases who they are. (https://www.oprahmag.com/life/relationships-love/a32824297/color-blind-myth-racism/). I can hear the “But Dr. King wanted a world where his children would be judged by the content of their character and not the color of their skin, so I teach my children to see people for what they are and not what color they are.” I know what Dr. King said. And this is true—every human being should be regarded for who they are rather than what they look like. But Dr. King wasn’t talking about disregarding the Blackness of his children or the Brownness and Whiteness of their friends.

It’s perfectly ok to notice a person’s skin color and/or ethnicity or to even notice the variations in a person’s outward appearance to ask about their ethnic background. That should be noticed, and it should be acknowledged. It’s all good provided your noticing of and asking questions regarding that comes from a place of kindness and genuine interest in the person as a human being (and if the questions sounds ignorant, you can apologize), and of course, is not inappropriate.

To acknowledge that a fellow human being is a different color than you or has a unique look about them is vitally important. It affirms the beauty in the unique background that person comes from, whether because they hail from a certain part of the world or because they are a gorgeous mix of several parts of the world. I believe human beings are uniquely created beings, not colorless souls bopping around this planet. Their race or blending of races is intrinsically a part of who they are. You can’t dismiss that in hopes that by professing to not notice skin color you are doing a person some holy favor. You are only diminishing one of the most important parts of what makes them great.

Listen, “having racist thoughts does not make you a racist but failing to question your racially-based assumptions does.” (https://www.rd.com/article/why-you-should-stop-saying-i-dont-see-color/). You notice when you enter a room and, in the people, represented there are lots of colors that are different from yours. And that can cause you to make assumptions about where you are, what you are there for, and what the people surrounding you are really like. If you are doing that, you need to address it. Because denying that shows you are actually working harder to look away from a piece of someone’s humanity over anything else. And that’s not right.

See the color. Acknowledge it. Embrace it. Endeavor to understand all that it represents. And most of all, respect it.

You do see color.